So about time to write another post...

Currently I'm working on my thesis... not right this minute, but I hope to do more work this evening (with what little I have left after skiing all day). This week and the next two are finalizing weeks, but especially this one. I have to get my methodologies down, write my research questions (mostly all written) and double check them, start the application process for Human Subjects approval, and then December 5th I travel to Tulum, Mexico! Que fantastico! I'm scared like none other... it's so huge, traveling on my own to a foreign country, doing research at this conference, having to do the majority of it in Spanish (yikes! guess what I'll be doing over Thanksgiving) and all this for my master's project! I feel incredibly grown-up.

I sure hope I can pull this off. Human Subjects Review takes about a week to get through (or longer) and I have to have their approval before I can do the research... unfortunately I don't know much about my sample population yet, and I won't know if I can actually do research at the conference till the 20th or so (which I need a letter saying I can do research from a conference organizer to get HSR approval)... and so much of this is going to happen more last minute than this! Sheesh.

Beyond that I have my 4 classes to get through as well. I am basically missing the last week before finals for my trip, so I have to get a bunch done before I leave, and then take a test when I come back. I've made a list of everything I need to do to finish out the semester, and it's long, but luckily listing it makes me feel better... now I won't forget to do anything!

I think I'm going to work on my project for Environmental Education tonight... It's due Wednesday. I also hope to type all my research questions. OH! and I should email professors about being gone in Mexico.

Phew! But good news is, I have new skis, and got to try them today! It was a rough start but by the end of the day I'd gotten used to the skis, luckily!

Tomorrow... my first two fillings EVER. :( ah well, I guess it happens to almost everyone!

Well, I had my birthday, it was a really good day. The following day wasn't as good... being nervous about my committee meeting wasn't cool, but it went ok.

Now I have to go buy a ticket to Mexico, and they're double the price than last week when I looked. GRRRRR!

But, I did have a nice sunday school today, we started talking about the mission trip with the senior high kids (and 8th grader this year) and it sounds really neat, and on top of that, a few of the kids requested that I do come on the trip with them. Yay!

We'll be doing work with Humane Borders, which sounds really neat. Providing water to Mexicans trying to cross the desert into the US. Etc...

Now today I'm going to do some studying, then go to Church again for a halloween party:)

working on the thesis proposal with the intent to email it to my professors in 2 hours... it's probably not going to be super complete, but I need to move on to something else for at least a day.

Laura was in town almost this whole week, so I got to see her yesterday after classes in the evening. We couldn't really decide what to do, but then she suggested bingo, so we said awesome! After dinner and a drink at the Trailhead we headed over to Bingo, and two hours later, on the last game of the night, the last call of the night, I won! And if it weren't for two other people having valid bingos, I would have won 500 dollars. As it was, I got 166:) Laura and I split the cash, and she went home. It was some of the most profitable and fun spontaneous time I'd ever had!

Back to the thesis...

yay me, I finished the philosophy midterm and held my own in discussion of them last night. I even made a comment without being called on! I guess silly to be happy about that, but my goal is to at the least have one a week... it's a tough class.

Now I get to work on my thesis again, finally. I think other school work will be placed on hold for the time being.

And it's Friday! Taizé tonight at the student center... I'm going with YUCCA (the Young UCC Adults) and with our Senior High Youth Group. Taizé brothers travel once a year to three places in the world, and this year they're in Fort Collins! So I couldn't resist the opportunity to experience Taizé with them!
http://www.taize.fr/en
Have a good weekend!

Are you ready for this?

I'm quitting one of my jobs (the I-House one) and that makes me sad. However now I will have a bit more time to focus on school and my thesis, which, in about 3 weeks I should be having my first committee meeting to discuss the revised proposal and my research interview quetions, in 4 weeks I should have compiled my Human Subjects Review and will be turning that in and simultaneously figuring out if I can do research at a conference in Mexico early December. Early December I go to the conference, ideally collect all the data I need, and then start transcribing after finals are done. After that, writing the thesis hopefully to get it done and my defense done by early April. Luckily next semester all I enroll in is 6-7 Thesis credits (which is really just writing the thesis... no class involved here) and (of course) a Spanish class because I like to torture myself with doing more than I have to. It sounds sooo ridiculously simple, and even Stu, my advisor, said it's pretty simple from here on out... I have all my background research done, basically. But I can't believe that it is really that simple.
Chalk that up to the 4 classes THIS semseter on top of trying to get my thesis research started!
Chalk it up to the idea that I might not get all of my research done at this conference!
Chalk it up to the fact that the conference might be entirely in Spanish!

But, at least I have a timeline and a basic gameplan.

Now, instead of beginning this process, I have to go back and continue to study and write for my philosophy midterm due Thursday. Once I start it, I know it will flow, but I still have a bit of reading to go!

ps-I'm still incredibly happy at the speed of my computer! It works, and it works well, and it is a functional, happy computer now. No sad macs here (Sex in the City reference!)... to think I almost broke down and just bought a new tower, it would have been at least double what I spent to fix my problema. Happy Happy Happy!

YAY! I can finally post (though I don't have the time to!) becuase I finally got new memory for my computer, and now it actually runs (as opposed to running SOOOOOOO slowly). So, I'm rejoycing this morning in the beauty that is a computer that runs faster. Though I do have to go in and chat with my advisor about my thesis at 10:15... kida intimidating, but it should help get me on task.

Dinner with Xinhua and Angela this afternoon then studying and tea with Logan.

Well a brief update...

end of the summer involved a trip to the boyfriend's family reunion for about 4.5 days straight, and it ended up being fun most of the time (not to disregard the few more difficult times). I got to the Renaissance festival with my sister, my best friend and her significant other (who is now a fiancee).
I moved apartments... the day I got back from the family reunion.
It didn't involve any additional hiking sadly, but did involve some stress at the coming school year and how I could possibly fit work x2, classes x4 and boyfriend and fun and thesis research into one 7x24 hour schedule.

School started halfway through August and I still haven't done any additional concrete research for my thesis, but have managed to forget about my reading assignments for Environmental Education as well as the paper due Monday. Spanish has been good but difficult and I don't know that I'll ever take another graduate-level philosophy seminar class in the evening (7-10pm!). Work with the new folk took getting used to, but is good and I wish I could do that 40 hours a week instead of school.
New people at job numero 2 as well, management staff is taking a while to get used to... such a different dynamic now with two men.

This recent time in my life has also been characterized by a loss in the amount of sleep I've been getting, a loss in quality time with the boyfriend (none till last night/today since 2 weeks ago and maybe more), a decline in the 5K run training with the roomie, but a recent push to keep it up in time for an October race.

Also a nice (except for the couple of day-long headaches) visit last weekend to Houston & Beaumont/Nederland/Port Arthur & Galveston to visit good friends.

So, now to go finish up my Spanish for tomorrow morning (8am!) before midnight after getting off of class today at 10pm!
Love to you all!

Thoughts:

I'm not a drinker... half a cup of beer gives me a nice relaxed buzzy feeling...

I am beginning to enjoy studying again... or at least the reading of interesting and relevant material to my thesis...

I really like editing video... but more often than not it's like drugery and is annoying... but when you get a comment from your boss that you have an eye for it, it makes it all worthwhile!

Trying to teach a man so salsa and merengue who is somewhat too independent to learn the basic steps (but very important stuff) before trying the Pretzle is annoying, but very adorable.

Tomorrow am runnig with Amy! I'm really liking this... some things you just can't do yourself when your brain gets in the way:)

aaaaarrrrggggg little brothers! grrr

in other news, apparently my cousin is now engaged and he and his fiance will be married next July.

I am the happiest I've ever been right now.

Back to work and thesis work. I need to kick my butt in gear with this one, it's already July, which means a month and a half till school starts, basically.

Saw some neat model airplanes yesterday up North of Wellington. Some model airplane club gave an airshow. It was complete with an awesome jet-turbine powered helicoper model and a professional modeler who did a show with his plane to the Stars and Stripes Forever. Totally good! I also got myself a fantastic sunburn... I forgot to apply sunscreen one place... one place! I've also learned that I really don't think I can wear anything but SPF 50 for more than daily walking around. Grr.

I don't think that in the summertime there is anything better than an outdoor swimming pool or a nice long cool bike ride along the Poudre River.

It's especially nice when there is no longer a good adult (as in, not a kiddie pool) oudoor public pool in town, and you end up getting into the Country Club pool for free because the "Munozs' are big in pools" lol.

A good weekend is planned. A hike to Horsetooth Rock tomorrow with my sister, then taking out dad finally for a movie and dinner. Sunday is church and teaching Xinhua (my roommate) how to make cookies!

Good news!

My advisor approved of my research proposal, so with bunches more work to clarify the research, and getting ready for the actual interviews, I'll be started on my research. It's still in the beginning phases, and I suppose there is so much that could go wrong and end up throwing me off track, but there is beginning to be a light at the end of the tunnel! I have a deadline... if I want to graduate this Spring, I need to be done in April, early April.

And the great thing is, if I'm not done then, I have a second chance... to graduate by the summer I have till the beginning of July.

I'm going to try and work as hard as I can to get this research going and off the ground. Tomorrow I'll do a few hours after work and before I go to exercise with a friend. Then I think I'll come back and keep organizing my room/organizing my existing sources for my paper.

Tried out the new huge slides at City Park Pool today... or tried out one, but with the lifeguards telling Logan (who is a fellow lifeguard for the City) that you have to be careful not to fly out of the twisty slide on corners... I left that one out for the time being...

I suppose everyone has days when they are more self-aware than normal, right? Times when that cute bathing suit ends up not looking so great?

The trip to Michigan was really nice. We wanted to go to Niagara Falls, but didn't bring the right paperwork to get back into the US, so instead visited the Thumb of Michigan and Frankenmuth... a day that was ok, and full of driving.

Sunday Sam and I were invited to join the Father's Day celebrations of my Aunt and Uncle and so celebrated the first Funcle's Day ever. A very good time. Sam and I are going to take out our actual dad sometime soon for a movie and dinner.

This weekend should be my first pedicure ever:) Sam owes me one from my birthday last year.

Just continuing to work on the playground science instructional video otherwise. We'll probably be doing some filming Friday morning so I can have more material to work with when Brian leaves town again.

And, I am thinking that life is really good, but graduate school still kind of scares me. But, I think I'll be ok next semester even if I take more classes. I at least know what to expect this time. So I'm resting up and getting prepared for more studying. I suppose I should be studying now, but I barely have the gumption to get some exercise in. Lol. June is almost done, I hope July is more productive!

Another weekend and only a few more days before the entire family (except Matt, I guess) heads out to Michigan for Pat's high school graduation. It's a 2 day drive out there so we'll arrive Friday evening/afternoon (we're leaving Wednesday evening). I'm glad to be going out again, it's been a while since we've been out, and I don't think the Loveland Crandalls have ever been out there. Sadly it's going to be basically an extended weekend since the drive is so long and Sam and I wanted to get home for work so are coming home Tuesday evening. So blocking out Saturday (graduation) and Sunday (graduation party... in their invite... we're the attraction!) it only leaves Monday to go to the zoo. It would be awesome if we could go! A zoo I've never been to.

Maybe I can get Logan to the Denver Zoo at some point.

After this trip, I believe I'll be around Fort Collins for good this summer.

Tomorrow the church votes on whether or not to spend the capital campaign money on building part of the master plan. My guess is, the vote will go through. What is proposed so far seems ok to me, bu tthere are some people who just now decided that they should speak up that they don't like the master plan. huy! congregationalists...

Well, I'm off to start my day!

Laura moves to Colorado Springs tomorrow. I'm kind of sad, even if it is only a 2 hour journey from here. I don't like driving to the Springs in the summer, it is an incredibly hot drive, especially the bit through Denver. I help her move and pack the rest of her boxes and then have church Sunday. I believe the family may be going up to Estes Park for Memorial Day food of some sort, dinner or lunch, I don't know.

Took some video at a shoot yesterday for an instructional video about educational playgrounds this woman designs. Brian is just not meant to be on camera when there is only one.. he moves so fast and I just know this thing is going to be so hard to edit. If I have learned one thing this year, I have learned that I do not have the intuition to be a good cameraman without training like I can with editing. So, luckily I am a good editor and very instinctual. Maybe I can make a video that passes inspection (and gets us paid) and makes sense out of a mockery of a video shoot yesterday. Also, 25 3rd graders are ridiculously hard to film and get to listen to you and not block the camera.

Saw X-Men 3 tonight with Logan and a bunch of his friends and their friends. We took up practically a whole row at the theatre. A good flick, fun and fairly good plot and CGI. A film that should definetly be seen in the theatre on the big screen, though I wouldn't take it as far as seeing it on an IMax.

The Peace Corps interview I had today is done, driving around downtown Denver was successfully accomplished, and was actually kind of fun! AND, it looks like I'll be nominated! I don't know where or what yet because I can't leave till May/June next year, and they don't have concrete details on any of the programs that leave July/August/Sept 07 yet. And I can't be nominated for the previous 3 month departure date because they don't know specific times during it, and I'm not available before mid-May. So the next step is getting my medial forms done (at the end of summer or in September so I don't have to do them again later) and double checking on the PCMI stuff at CSU.

WOO!

I also had to fill out a relationship form because of my new romance... I have some new questions to discuss with Logan... but on the whole I'm not to worried, if we last, we'll last, and if not, I can't regret anything, not dating him, not going into the PC and breaking up... etc.

SO, more laundry today, doing some I-House work, and catching up with Laura later on this afternoon.

Woo!

Kansas here I come!

I'm done with my first year of graduate school. I feel a great pressure just lifted off my life almost. Especially because I think I've made a decision about this summer too. The paper I turned in today was the longest I've ever written, I believe. Even my thesis for honors in biology wasn't 30 pages (26 or 27 excluding references). The cool thing was, I didn't write all those 30 pages in one sitting. I wrote part of it for a different paper due last week, and that paper was based on a revision of a paper I wrote last December. Today and yesterday I wrote about 15 pages.

So now, I work, I try to get my thesis going (!!!) and relax.

Tonight is the 5 month anniversary... we won't be together on our 6th, but that's not why we're getting together... more a celebration of finals and the ability to go Salsa dancing again. The anniversary just kinda made today more special. So I'm going to make some dinner and then we'll go over and (I'm going to for sure!) have some drinks and dance.

So I'm going to head to Kansas next week/weekend for graduation and to visit friends! The non-exciting part about it is that there is an outbreak of a mutated form of mumps going around at KU... it affects people who have had the shot. That is so crazy. Lol.

To finishing a full year of graduate school and surviving extremely well!

It has been a lovely weekend. Now, over because I'm preparing a presentation for class tomorrow morning. I'm hoping it won't take me too long. Then I'm sleeping!

Sam is home, and so far we've seen each other all three days she's been here. I'm so glad to have summer so close. We played some games yesterday and listened to Garrison Kielor's show... we did mainly because it's good, but also because one of the local groups that played on his show yesterday are a family (the Greenes) we know from church. And then today in senior high sunday school (which I am now helping Bill with, and next year too) Josh, the eldest Greene came in, so it was fun listening to what he had to say about performing on A Prairie Home Companion yesterday. Sam and I really wanted Garrison to talk to the family, especially because Jonah, their youngest (11 years) who plays the drums would have been hilarious.
Check out their website: http://www.freewebs.com/thegreenesband/

Then today later in the afternoon Sam and I went swimming at EPIC and enjoyed ourselves.

Ontology... an interesting word. Something I have to consider for my presentation tomorrow and subsequent paper due Thursday. Ontology: the study of being, the word about the essence of things, the word about being. Madeleine L'Engle calls a blueberry bush ontological, it doesn't have the opportunity to be prideful or selfish, a bush just is, humans on the other hand have to work to just be.

"I go to the brook because I get out of being, out of the essential. So I'm not like the bush, then. I put all my prickliness, selfishness, in-turnedness, onto my isness; we all tend to, and when we burn, this part of us is consumed. When I go past the tallest blueberry bush, where my twine is tied to one of the branches, I think that the part of us that has to be burned away is something like the deadwood on the bush; it has to go, to be burned in the terrible fire of reality, until there is nothing left but our ontological selves; what we are meant to be." pg. 7 "A Circle of Quiet"

The semester is wrapping up quickly

This week hasn't been as horrible as I was expecting it to perhaps be. I had a presentation Tuesday and got the one today changed to Monday, and then I had a paper due today for my theory class. The paper wasn't so bad, and actually was at its heart a revision of the research proposal I wrote last semester, and so I actually liked what I was writing for the first 2/3rds of the paper (till I got to the methods section and the last half of the literature review... and also cause it was 2:30am!).

Next up is a paper due Friday at noon, which is going to be the hardest one of the three I have/had to do. It's about the norm activation model proposed by Schwartz (a norm is what people percieve as what "should or ought to be" and there are personal and social norms... they can predict behavior and are activated by different concepts, of which I studied Awareness of Consequences and Ascription of Responsibility) and trying to apply it to visitor behaviors at archaeological sites in Jordan. The data was done by someone else and already in the statistics program, but I had to choose what analyses to run and now have to write a paper on it. I still don't completely understand the concepts, but, I'll wing it:)

I have a new roommate, her name is Xinhua and she's from China. So far she's quiet and keeps to herself for the most part. She is really nice, and we've had some exchanges mainly related to hooking up her tv in her room and about how the microwave sparks. But, its dead week (week before finals) and soon finals week, so we're busy. I hope we can get to know each other well.

In terms of Stanford, they do not pay for housing, so I honestly don't know if I can go and do this internship. And I kinda just want a break. I got a scholarship (!!!) which now means I have to stay as a full time student when I had been planning on only taking 6 credits and relaxing a bit. I'm going to take Spanish though, so it will be more relaxing than three full time graduate or upper level classes. And I am getting excited about the idea of maybe having come up with my own project, actually doing my own research, that I think will be incredibly beneficial and add to the literature (which is such a huge requirement) on community based ecotourism. So, we'll see if I even get offered it!

So, I'm going to see what I can do with this Friday paper tonight so I am not up again super late tomorrow.

Grwarrrrr!
I'm way to up and down, even in a single day, for my own good.

well, I was called out and am a computer un-nerd. comment moderation, didn't know what that was and thanks to dear Naomi I discovered a backlog of comments! WOOHOO! So thanks to everyone for their comments. Erika, I hope you enjoy TA Barron... I started with 'The Merlin Effect" fyi. Lindsay, yup, I have a blog, and isn't it nice? I hope the vertigo hasn't come back. Naomi, you will always be far more technologically superior than I... and yeah, further away, but still a fun place to visit.

I was looking at a map last night and discovered that if I end up in Stanford I could visit the cities I was born and spend the first few months of my life in (Oakland and Walnut Creek, CA)! But then I also realized that if I want to visit San Francisco in my car, I should probably psych myself up for the massive hills.

And the best thing is, yesterday evening after I let Logan know the good news, he surprised me by coming over and congratulating me! It's good to know that he's not clingy, I guess, and that he is so supportive! Did I ever say it? I'm in love! :)

Naomi! I guess you're pretty busy... here I've got this great website you can post on now and not a word from you! (just giving you a hard time!).

So last Wednesday I mailed in my internship application to Stanford (which is in Palo Alto, CA apparently) and received this email today:

"Heather,
We were very impressed by your credentials, and we have short-listed you for the upcoming internship opportunity at CESD-Stanford. As such, I would very much like to conduct a phone interview with you sometime during the next few days.
Please let me know your availability during business hours for the following dates: Friday, April 28; Monday, May 1; and Tuesday, May 2. And, please submit a phone number where you can be reached during those times. With this information, I will arrange to speak with you for twenty minutes.
I will then notify you by Friday, May 5 as to whether or not you have beenawarded the internship position.
I look forward to talking with you soon.

Best,
Geraldine
Stanford Coordinator
Center on Ecotourism and Sustainable Development"

It's really exciting, provided that if I get it I can pay for housing this summer. A great opportunity, but really, whether I get it or not, they are impressed with my credentials, with ME! Stanford!

So, I'm beginning to wonder when I will stop coming across these really great opportunities that test my independence as a woman and committment to getting my degree.

I found out on Monday about this amazing sounding internship in Stanford at the Center on Ecotourism and Sustainable Development. It is an internship that focuses mainly on research the entire summer about community based ecotourism in Central America, AND when I emailed the lady accepting applications, she said I could use what I do during the internship for my Masters project. So.... I applied and shipped it overnight to Stanford yesterday morning. If I get this that means a temporary vacate from my apartment for the summer (so I can come back, but don't have to pay rent) finding an apartment in Stanford, carting enough of my stuff there in my very small car to make the new apartment liveable, working straight through the summer for 10 weeks, 40 hours a week (UHG, I need a break!!) doing almost nothing but reading, and probably coming back the week after school starts here, unless I miss my cousin's high school graduation in June and go out earlier to Stanford.

So, great opportunity, and I am sure I'd enjoy it, and it would be the first summer I've ever spent outside of Colorado (a good thing to experience I think) but I wouldn't get to do all these things I'd been planning on for the summer. I wanted to hike some 14ers and spend time with my sister and go on a road trip with Laura and work at LSOP and spend time with Logan. But... I hope I get it, I really really hope I do. Life would be easier, and I might actually be able to get out of the MS program in 2 years. WOW. So, right now everything is up in the air till I start hearing back from all these opportunities. But keep it in mind, I may be in Stanford this summer. :)

Did I ever say? I went to a Guster concert a few weeks ago and it was amazing. I really had a good time despite some sweaty tall drunk guys who were being jerks for about a half hour. But it was fun! I'm going to try getting to more concerts more often, because the music is just so different when you hear it live.

Happy Easter!

Had good family time this weekend, and my aunt is going to frame my diploma from KU for me, so I can't wait till I get it back and can hang it up for everyone to see. I still sometimes forget that I actually have a degree... still being in school and all that.

I will be having a new roommate move in May 1st. She's originally from China. And then sometime this summer, perhaps in August before school starts again, I'll move in with Amy L., my current co-worker (and technically boss... she's the manager, I'm the manager's assistant...) and friend once she's no longer the manager and therefore no longer entitled to the two person room with just her in it. I took her some cookies today and we had a nice chat, along with her neighbor, Chris from England, from across the hallway. I wish I could move in with her earlier, but it sounds like it is not to be. I'm looking forward to my new roommate, but am not sure how to manuver my things so that I feel like it is still my apartment, but so that she feels that she can add a personal touch to it as well.

So, I'm back to studying. I actually did quite a good job today of that, despite starting later than I should have and watching more TV than I should have. Meh.

so unless I get offered a Biology Lab TA position (which pays for my tution as well as a stipend) then I'll be working at Little Shop again next year. We'll see... I am pretty darn sure that I'm going to get the biology position with my experience, but who knows. That would make life easier, by far easier, I could work faster on paying of my car repair debt and wouldn't be adding any additional loans for next year. So the current plan is to work like there is no tomorrow to get research started and then graduate next May and go into the Peace Corps.

I'm looking forward to the summer!

I just got offered a job... or at least requested to apply to a job through the office of Service Learning and Civic Engagement as the graduate coordinator for Americorps at CSU for next year. Dilemma. It sounds like a really great opportunity, I'd be working 20 hours a week (so not all that much, meaning I can still go to school/class) and I'd be earning significantly more than I currently do... and I still don't know about that GTA biology lab TA bit (which would earn a ton more than either LSOP or the Americorps position). So, a really great sounding job, working with people in the Americorps and in a coordinator type role... something I know I would be good at, my brain just works like that. The only catch is, it's a year long position, and the second is, it starts this summer, and I've already kinda decided I'd be working LSOP this summer (really, for lack of a better job) and I had plans for a lot of travel this summer too. I don't know what to do.

On top of that, I just had an idea for an actual research project not affiliated with the Peace Corps in any way... actual research... and something I might do anyways because it would help me if I enter the PC and it's just something I think needs to be done... basically a study of a number of Latin American community-based projects (hopefully they exist... I think they do) to analyze the strategies they use and overall what they view as the difficulties and benefits of such projects. The literature seems to me missing just such a study. Oh my God... I think I finally became a graduate student.

UHG! Well, maybe I express interest, and hope to hear from the PC recruiter soon so I get more of an idea of when I might be scheduled for departure... really, I feel like maybe if I got my act together, especially this summer and next fall, I may only have to push PC back one semester, and I could graduate with my MS in the Spring next year then enter the Peace Corps?

Also, I should talk to Stu about this.

Crap...I didn't really want an opportunity or an idea like this to come my way... I know I was saying if I found a good job I might just quit graduate school and put this whole bit on hold because it's hard and I didn't know what I was doing in terms of research... but I didn't expect to get a job offered to me in the context of school and simulaneously (I mean, I thought of this idea THIS MORNING) come up with a potential research project.

Whoa.

Friday night turned out to be the best date for what I needed. I guess I get easily freaked out because my mind is always working double time in the thinking department... and unfortunately not in the school department, like I wish... and for the past few times we'd seen each other, we'd stayed in and for whatever reason hadn't talked that much. So Friday at the Cherry Blossom FAC we had time to talk, and quite a bit of it, and then his friends invited us to a movie so we went and saw Inside Man (a Spike Lee movie you should see... it's trippy... a movie hasn't confused me like that since Mission Impossible). So it was good all around... we talked, we actually went out instead of renting a movie or having tea at my place, and I got more "face-time" with some of his friends, whom I have still yet to meet most of (though I'm sure I'll recognize them cause many are from high school).

So yeah, life's back to being good. And can I say, I believe I'm finally falling incredibly hard for Logan? I think I held back a little bit because of PC off in the future but for whatever reason, I've started falling for him even more than I already had. Yikes!

In other news, I've not gotten quite used to the homework and schoolwork routine yet after my Spring Break in Panama. So that's going to mean some hard core working on school stuff tonight... meh. School has kinda stopped bothering me. I'm more ambivalent about it... perhaps it is because already, my coursework is almost over (one more semester!) and maybe it's because I'm realizing if I don't want to do this, I don't have to and I can quit. I'm going to stick it out though.
I'm also going to see Guster in concert this Saturday! WOO! I'm super excited, especially because I don't have to leave Fort Collins to see them as they're playing the Aggie Theatre. I invited Ryan up to see them with me cause he likes Guster and introduced me to them last year. SO... my second concert ever:) and it's going to be great!

panama wrapup

me gusta Panama! Such a lovely place... so green and humid and warm. We met only nice, welcoming people. Now I feel like I've got some new aunts and uncles, as well as un mas abuelita.
I'm still processing the trip. It's caused me to question much more about my future, which while frustrating will end up being a good think in the end whatever happens with Peace Corps.
I'm looking forward to seeing Logan... drat busy schedules, I can't see him till Thursday.

To bed, b/c I'm super tired... it's 2 hours later in Panama!

Woohoo! Spring Break:) I'm so glad that it is finally here... we can all use the break. I leave for the airport Sunday at 7:30am. The flight leaves at 11am and by 10pm (Pacific Time) we are in Panama City! We spend the night there and then Monday we drive across Panama following the Canal and have lunch in the outskirts of Colon. The next 6 days or so we spend half the day building a birdwatching platform for the community, and the other half we spend in cultural tourism.
I'll talk to you all after break!

Snow.... I don't know if I'm happy or not... I like snow, but I also was really enjoying our 60 degree weather. Well, maybe if it stays cold and snowy when I get down to Panama on Sunday night, the hot and humid weather will feel nice by comparison rather than stiflingly hot.

I cut my hair off yesterday. Yay! And it was free, which is always nice. I wish I knew how many inches it was... at least 5 I'd say.
Ok, I'm off to class and work... wish me luck leading discussion in recreation behavior theory today!

I'm back from a day of inspiring Girl Scout leaders to be the best they can be and from a night of watching the Oscar nominated short documentary films. If I had been less tired, the films would have been more enjoyable... but I'm glad I went. The place I went I just discovered, and it makes my heart sing! The Denver Film Society has a place in Denver that shows international and independent films and things such as the Oscar nominated short documentaries and short fiction films. WOO!
I'm super excited too that they will be showing CSA: Confederate States of America. This film I saw maybe 2 or 3 years ago in Lawrence. It was directed by Kevin Wilmott... the first film teacher I ever had. He took it to Sundance along with the co-producer (I believe) Matt Jacobson, who I took my video production class from, and it was picked up for distribution by Spike Lee.
SWEET!!!
So, whenever it starts playing, be expecting me (if you live in CO) to be dragging you to see it... it's a part of my history, and the film means a lot to me in the sense that it was made in Lawrence, by people I know and respect, and I got to see the film at the Kansas premiere... so, I want to share that part of my life with my Colorado friends!
http://denverfilm.org/scheduledetail.cfm?MOVIEID=1024775
whoa... it's playing the 10th through the 16th... so that means this will be a really soon thing...

Current mood... yuck. Current face condition, still completely sunburnt. The only good thing about this week is that is it is almost over and that I did get to go skiing.

Currently Listening
Fumbling Towards Ecstasy
By Sarah Mclachlan

this is a busy week, phew. Little Shop of Physics has the annual Open House this Saturday 10-6pm (for those of you in town...) and we have lots of prep going on for that, and I have a number of assignments coming due... as well as a new roommate who potentially will be moving in this weekend??? Maybe, that's totally a guess, but the custodial does come tomorrow to clean the apartment for her...


I love where I work, so much, so much. It makes my life so enjoyable. Why don't I just quit school and do this? Because maybe I'm meant to create something this cool somewhere else and I'm not there yet? Because I really do enjoy learning and school? Because because because...
Sometimes I try to stop trying to explain things. I can do this with God... I don't need explanations, I have faith. I try to have faith in my everyday life... faith in myself that I can do what I set for myself to do, faith in my relationships, that they are good and faith in my friends and family that they are good people... it comes and goes, that faith. I think God wants me to be more faithful in my everyday life. Is it strange that for me I much easier have faith in God than in things that surround me? Perhaps it is because things surrounding me technically should have explanations... God doesn't need any?


So, random musings for the day. I'm getting some work done, cleaning some dishes and going to a Panama Spring Break meeting. Tonight we get our packng lists. I love packing lists!

ps. for those of who who are discovering this blog for the first time, I'm still updating it from my old blog... might as well, right? So keep checking back for more as the semester continues. Just make sure to look at the date of the post... the posts are currently from a year ago!

Currently Reading

Studies in Outdoor Recreation: Search and Research for Satisfaction

By Robert E. Manning


I'm just working on some homework in preparation for a test Monday. Then I have to get my move on with a survey I need to design for another class assignment due Tuesday.

Heard back from the radiologist... no breaks, fractures or dislocations! Just a plain old sprain. Logan's dying his hair red next... he said he didn't want to get hurt at the rock concert he's going to in a few weeks should he show up with pink (now turning orangeish) hair. Sheesh! heheheNext Saturday (the 25th) at LSOP Open House, I'll be meeting Logan's Aunt, Uncle and two young cousins. Oh, and we were almost discovered today at work... I was showing someone the pictures I took on the walk in to school this morning (beautiful snow!) and had forgotten that Valentine's Day pictures were also on there. Oops.Today after work I actually made it to the rec center with Laura and we got our work-out on. Man, I miss swimming. I'm asking the doctor tomorrow when I can swim!


Ya'll take care my friends. Have a happy weekend!



It is fun to have confetti and chaos every now and again.=)Mmmm, swimming! I'm taking an HSES class and it makes me smile- forced swimming twice a week!
Posted 2/17/2006 5:44 PM by Shannona

Yay!!!

So last night I made white chocolate macadamia nut cookies for Logan and took them over to him. He seemed surprised... he said it threw him off. hehe. Tonight he's making me dinner!


Today I'm trying a new wrap for my wrist... I've worn this before for my cyst, so I'm hoping that overall it will still support my hand but not feel like I'm cutting off circulation and make it feel worse:)

Add to that list of stupid things I've done... riding my bike on an icy morning. The result? A fall and a sprained wrist. First ever. But, I'm doing ok! Happy Weekend!



Oh my! Hope that got better over the weekend. BE CAREFUL!
Posted 2/12/2006 4:41 PM by steph421

Man, I was really productive tonight! Granted, it wasn't that I did a whole lot of stuff... but what I said I wanted to do, I've accopmlished for the most part. All that is left is to prepare briefly for my class I teach tomorrow. It will be interesting trying to get there with enough time to prepare as we just got a bunch of beautiful snow... finally!!!!!!!!!!!!


I mean, I even made and ate a fantastic dinner tonight, and there are tons of leftovers. Also good, saw Logan, he was able to eat some of my food (he had Japanese Bowl for 2.5 hours tonight.. yikes!) since he hadn't been home for dinner yet anyways. And, Natalie is moving out this weekend. I feel bad that I'm glad to be rid of her... she's had a hard semester thus far... she's back with no money trying to make school work so she can get her PhD... but she's annoying, incredibly annoying. If she'd listen to my advice, I'd give it more often, but she just constantly refutes it or say she already knows that. She makes huge assumptions and should I begin to talk to her about anything it will last at least a good half hour or more. Oh man, I don't know.


Anyways, time to move on to my last task for the night. And then it's Friday! happy happy day! And tomorrow night I get to see Citizen Kane and a French New Wave film for only $3.50!

I should be in bed right now, but because I had to use the bathroom before doing so...
The door wouldn't open! I found myself trapped in my own room! I've been studying with the door closed because otherwise my roommate just keeps talking to me... not bad in certain circumstances... but tonight I had to type up a paper for class tomorrow at 8am. Anyways, I went to go to the bathroom, and the bedroom door wouldn't open! And it wasn't locked either... cause of course it would be quite easy to solve if that were the case. I pulled out my handy toolkit and found some things to play around with and try to make the door open, but it started to take longer than expected, and I was really starting to worry that I'd have to climb out my window and run around to the front door of my apartment (thank goodness now for the first floor apartment!) but luckily I jimmied it open after maybe 10 minutes.


That was one of the strangest things that has happened to me ever. I don't know that I'll be closing my door again for a while, so it's lucky that the roomie is moving out this weekend.
:)

the pink hair glows in the dark room.


He died it pink because he got called in to train at work on Saturday which he had planned to go skiing during and was probably the best day of skiing this season so far. So, he felt a little ornry (sp?).


I'm dropping one of my classes, and it feels really good. Especially cause I can still possibly take an independent study with that teacher over that subject this summer! Now maybe life will be a little more relaxing.

Currently Listening

Demon Days

By Gorillaz



I just spent some great time with Laura tonight crafting and watching movies. Course, Natalie was in the room the entire time and commenting on the movies and making a general nusiance of herself. But whatever. It was Laura-Heather time and was needed. She's in love, my childhood best friend. She's in love with a man who is good, and a man who will be in Iraq next October, and who is in training in Georgia now. She's taking it well, so well, especially considering the fact that here I am with my amazing new relationship wanting to talk about it and she does, and she's happy for me and she's happy herself (though sometimes lonely, I get the impression). To bed!


oh, and Logan's dyeing his hair pink... tonight I heard the first stage - bleaching - was almost complete. I'm trying hard to be open-minded, but really, in general I find it hilarious. I told my dad... a warning of sorts today should we have dinner with my parents while it's still pink, and all Dad said was, "it's not my hair." Dad's a good man, and Logan... he's just crazy:)

Currently Listening

Garden State

By Various Artists


Go see the film Munich. But don't go see it at any showing later than 9pm, because it is three hours and all you want to do is cry afterwards and that's not conducive to sleep. It is a brilliant film. I highly recommend it. Many "oh!" moments for the cinematography and a solid A+ for the portrayal of the Palestinian and Israeli conflict. I'll leave it at that. Course, I am extremely fascinated by the subject anyways... but it's a Spielberg, and some of his best are the ones that deal with sticky issues and history.

Thank goodness for a life that has calmed down a bit more in recent days. I feel like I can breath again! And I can't help but like Wednesday evenings. Soup Night always puts a smile on my face, and it isn't just because of the free dinner. I get to chat with friends and enjoy good food and amazing conversation. Onto studying and a staff meeting!

P.S.: I am in love!

Just had a wonderful day that isn't over yet. I spent the day at the Abbey of St. Walburga with my college youth group (YUCCA - Young UCC Adults) and we planned the service we're leading Feb. 26th. Then I came home for a bit of family time and had not that tasty Chinese (not the highlight of the day) and now Logan is coming over to pick me up.


Tomorrow is the day of massive studying with Amy about Comm. Based Natural Resource Management. Her thesis for her minor in conservation biology is, coincidentally, the same as my proposal

Can I just give a shout out in thankfulness for relationships that are open in their communication!? WOO-HOO!


I'm tired today, but going to bed early and waking up in 8 hours ideally refreshed and ready for some studying before school.

"There can be no doubt that the desire lovers have for each other is not so very different from friendship - you might say it was friendship gone mad."Seneca, Letters from a Stoic

Currently Listening

Demon Days

By Gorillaz




I'm tired already and school is only 2 days in! This semester is going to be challenging:)

I had a brief period of not wanting school to start up again (and iterations of it all leading to Logan and I having to break up should we last that long, when I head to the Peace Corps assignment next January... sooo horrible and far reaching of me, I know... but I couldn't help it the thought came unbidden) but now I'm looking forward to it. I went to collect some textbooks today fully expecting one or two only, like last semester. nope. I have one text for one class, none for two classes, and seven texts for my community based natural resource management class. Books with these titles:
-Communities and the Environment: Ethnicity, Gender and the State in Community-Based Conservation-Working through Environmental Conflict: The Collaborative Learning Approach-Collaborative Environmental Management: What Roles for Government?-Bowling Alone-Groundwork for Community-Based Conservation: Strategies for Social Research-Swimming Upstream: Collaborative Approaches to Watershed Management& -Making Collaboration Work: Lessons from Innovation in Natural Resource Management

So looking at all these books makes me wish I had more money, but mainly makes me excited for this class and this semester and for the Peace Corps again. This is what I want to work in. All along I knew there should be a field that combined biological knowledge with working with people so they can begin to learn the importance of conservation, getting people involved in the process and excited about it. Involvement so they can see the benefits of conservation and the risks of utilitarianism and ubermanagement. Yay! Also it's very positive to see so many books, now that I think about it. I am so tired of reading articles. I know it won't stop, but it's nice to have some books that have to at least have some semblence of interest to readers beyond just the scholars of the world. Easier language so it becomes a faster read.

My roommate might be moving out. I hope this isn't God's way of letting me know to appreciate her despite her talkative nature and messy habits by giving me a new roommate next month who smokes and drinks and steals and is a pig etc.... Or cooks smelly food with my pots.
I'm in the process of hopefully reformatting my computer and clearing the drive and having a fresh start for the upcoming year. I hope to get rid of some viruses I have and finally eliminate Windows Millenium from the computer and completely switch to XP. Today I pulled all my music off my computer and archived it for the time being. Tomorrow I'm hoping to back up most everything else and go through the steps to rid myself of the viruses.

I've also decided that the second week of school I'm going to take my car in to have the ball joints replaced like was recommended. As I said before, I learned that it is a safety hazard to leave it un-fixed because a wheel could pop off. Logan mentioned his concern, which was sweet, and I had been thinking that I won't ever have the money for it, so might as well do it sooner. It ends up being under 500 dollars, which I don't thing is too bad.

Now, to bed! Church tomorrow and more getting ready for the new school year. Also some swimming if I can manage it.:)

Yesterday was hilarious in the sense that it ended up being just Logan, Natalie and I on the trip. Througout we were dropping hints like it was nobody's business because it was fun and I think because the day was a slow one (Nat's learning snowboard still, and we're both better than her). She was utterly clueless, despite the fact that she found out Logan got me free skis, we went skiing together last week, and he carried my skis (how sweet!) for me back to the car. Clueless, amazingly clueless. hehe

Otherwise things are uneventful. Classes start Tuesday as does the amazing busy life that I call mine. I'm doing a Girl Scout training in Greeley on Wednesday (stupidly signing up for it before checking my class schedule... I'll have to miss half of my last class that day) with my mom, which should be fun. I think she's aready super nervous, and I'll end up being lead trainer. Woo!

I'm off to finish some stuff up before heading to bed. I'm getting back to my school schedule for sleeping (except for tomorrow evening).

Currently Listening
Our Little Corner of the World: Music From Gilmore Girls
By Various Artists

More skiing tomorrow. This time I get to try out these nice Demo Pro skis. Having a boyfriend who works at Christy Sports rocks. This time it will be Natalie, Logan and I on the slopes, and potentially (and hopefully!) Kevin and Stephanie, should they decide to come.
School starts a week from tomorrow....

oh! and today I managed to make myself a (very makeshift) bookshelf out of my TV box and duct tape. Now I don't have books and movies lying around on the floor. Maybe once I get it completely structurally sound I'll cover it with fabric or paint it.

Currently Listening
Fijacion Oral vol. 1
By Shakira


Things are good, despite finding out that if a ball joint does break my tire could just fall off. lol. I guess I'll have to go get those replaced.

Dancing with Logan at Suite 152 on Thursday night. His first time was not that bad, but hopefully I can get him to some lessons. There is nothing better than dancing with a man who knows how to lead and can dance well (unless he can cook... it is a close tie).

Today I'm off to a craft day with my Panama Spring Break group so we can make bunches of cool stuff to hopefully sell at the Flea Market when school starts up again. (The Flea Market is actually a place in the Student Center where people can sit and sell stuff.)

And tomorrow is a historic day in my life. I will be attending the National Western Stock Show, which I have never done before. I'm both looking forward to it, and also a little bit dreading it since I do have to be there all day. Little Shop of Physics was requested to come down and have a booth there tomorrow to represent CSU (as we are the ag/land grant school). So whoohoo for being one of the only people wearing tie-die there!

I'm off to work again today after a few days of fun with friends and family. The application packet for Amazing Race was probably sent off by Dad yesterday. It feels really wierd to call myself one of those people who applies to reality tv shows, but it certainly was funny to do so (the video is good!). So, wish us luck. Either way, if we get it, or if we don't, it will be good. If we get it, we get to go around the world! And might win some money. If we don't get it, that's a whole lot of time I don't have to worry about taking off from work or school.

Went skiing yesteday with Logan and his younger brother Ian. Ian went off to do his own thing and Logan was nice enough to stay with me all day (which I guess should be expected) despite being much better than me (and I haven't been for at least two years).
Sam's making dinner tonight for the family, so I'll be home tonight.

And an update about the roomate. I think as we live together we're beginning to understand each other. It isn't so bad right now. Natalie turned 24 yesterday and I made it home, took a shower, and still had time to hang out in the living room with her and her friends from I-House to help celebrate her birthday. So that was good. I don't feel like such a bad roommate for leaving on her birthday.

Oh, yes, yes yes yes. 2006 has started remarkably well... just as 2005 ended remarkably well. Steph, you and Ben may well be right about your comment about mixing boys and vegetarianism... however I will have it known that I already have become more of a vegetarian for health rather than any obscure moral reason...

Happy New Year my friends! YAY!